A vision

Here I thought that my first blog upon returning to Petawawa from the beautiful NS would be about my fabulous shower and fabulous trip. I was even going to be very positive... But then today happened and I decided that I needed a venue to vent my frustrations, thus changing my mind.

Arriving back to Petawawa after a glorious, yet exhausting trip to NS, I was slightly disappointed to find that my pooch had come down with an ear infection - the most likely result of being fed wayyy too much wheat while I was away. What part of "Emma's allergic to wheat," do people not understand? Whatever. I have also been a culprit of giving her way to much of the many things she is not supposed to have. However, it is nonetheless frustrating.

I tried to clean her ears out in the vain hope that I could avoid a trip to the vet, and the unsightly bill ($250), but upon closer inspection realized that her ears were a mess and that a vet visit would be needed sooner than later (I was trying to postpone our next visit to May when I could get her prepped for heart worm (misquito) season....

After realizing that DH had yet to get our leash back after he loaned it out on the weekend (yes this means our dog has not been walked for nearly a week), I had to put the cat leash on the dog... no we don't own a cat, but the thin leash was great when she was small enough to fit in my lap... This thin leash meant no choke collar. Not that I am a fan of choking the brains out of my dog, but it does the job.

Arriving at the vet Emma wouldn't listen to my commands to stay in the car, as I tried to reach around her for my purse. I struggled with one arm to keep her in until invited to come out. Finally, I gave up, let her out of the car and she whipped me around in a full cirlce, stepping on my toe with her ridiculously sharp claws and b-lining it for the steps.

Once inside the vet office, my arm straining from having to hold onto her by her collar because the stupid thin leash kept cutting into my hand, I struggled to hold back my hormonal tears and reached for the phone and did the military wife no no. I called my DH at work and asked for help... but of course he could not leave the office to come and bring me a stronger leash, a choke collar and his mean daddy voice. I knew this before I even dialed. It was a weak moment.

So there I sat waiting, and praying that the doctor would soon come out to take Emma in, with a tight grip and my mean mommy voice saying "Emma sit, Emma stay, Emma stop," every two seconds. When we were finally called into the office Emma did her normal "I'm cute, so love me," act and the doctor looked at me like I was crazy for looking so stressed out.

Once out of the office I took Emma to the car before I payed for the visit... On my return back to the car I had an oh $hit moment... Driving back to my home the vision came, Emma and the vet with the baby. How will this task be completed without an army of dog walkers and baby sitters to assist me?

Then I began to think of what it will be like just to take the baby to the doctor. OH NO. And later a toddler... People will still look at me like I am crazy, DH won't be around to assist me when I have toddler throwing a tantrum, or a colic baby.... and they don't offer choke chains for babies... How many years will it be before I can turn off the mean mommy voice? Is it okay to change my mind about not wanting to be one of those parents who has a child leash? (I am now seeing the logistics in this device).

So like the good wife that I am I realized that it could definitely be worse and most likely will be by this time next year. I then sent a text message to DH apologizing for essentially not following military wife protocol (especially over the dog!).... Oh hormones, how you literally toy with my emotions.